32 messages asking me to suck his dick. And there for a minute i thought i was desperate. ha!
Hahahaha
make that 40.
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
Just know that as we speak i am injecting vodka into gushers
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Randomize
