he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
This is a whole other level of drinking. Like the I used to eat paste with these people kinda drinking.
its was like we drinking an entire bottle of mystery
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Can I fire a pigeon out of a t shirt gun?
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Randomize
