Think about all of the events that have led to this: me sitting in the back of my classroom drinking beer out of a taco bell cup, telling the teacher I have to leave early to go to an AA meeting.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
false alarm, still single
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