how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
just thought you should know that she got home at about 6am.... totally wasted. she was locked out and when i finally came to the door she was on a patio across the street with some random making hotdogs on somebodys elses bbq.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
she's throwing things again.. almost stabbed herself in the eye with a fork.
Theres a live mouse in the toilet. Goddamn you this is why I don't party here
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
We are so blessed to to have nicely shaped vaginas
I thank god almighty everyday
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I can't say too many people would say watching their drunk best friends fuck in a hot tub is very normal.
Randomize
