are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Or maybe my penis is just the key to their locked boxes of crazy, and I unleash their wrath upon all of mankind just so I can get my nut off
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Randomize