with your own penis?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
I was officially considered the drunkest person in cuba when the bartender at the swim up bar made me wear a life jacket for 'safety purposes'
The nurse who handed me my discharge papers underlined and highlighted do not consume alcohol while on my painkiller its like she knows me.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
He told me how it ended, then I blew him.
So he ruined the best cinematic experience of your life and you REWARDED him??
Me and mom just bonded over our mutual desire to bang Mark Ruffalo. I'm not sure how to feel about this.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
