You tried to call the hospital and left a voicemail asking if you could be put on the liver transplant list as a "pre-caution"
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
