Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
Woke up and went out for a cigarette and it was dead quiet. It was like the world just knew how many mistakes were made last night.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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