About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
You missed the winter stoner olympics last night....I got the gold in blunt rolling
I got a 5 dollar bill, 1 condom, and no alcohol. I get payed on Thursday. Let's do this shit.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
Randomize
