Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
she reminds me of the first time i discovered masturbation. that's how you know it's true love.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize