the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
chimney cleaner pole that expands when button is pushed then pull out. Remember that. We have to patent it.
Who are you high with right now?
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
I agreed not to hook up with any randoms while she's on vacation, if that isn't a show of good faith then I don't know what is...
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Don’t be alarmed my pee bowl is in your shower
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