her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Randomize
