There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
He started going down on me while we were watching Land Before Time.
Incredible.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
I hate how much more visible my vomit is on snow, I need a winter vomit bush
Randomize
