I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
i just came to a realization. Besides probably food, in my lifetime i think i have spent more money on legal fees than anything else
You decided it was too difficult to walk down the stairs so you just rolled across his kitchen floor laughing like a maniac and trying to drink at the same time
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize
