i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
at this point every shot is just a haymaker to my liver
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
i've eaten like 19 popsicles... what the fuck have you done today?
after he went down on me he said he wanted an air freshener for his car scented like my vag. i cant even.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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