I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
I just stepped on my own foot and apologized to my shoe... THAT high.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
bro, your right, i shouldn't feel embarrassed about taking shots from a penis-shaped ice sculpture
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
Randomize
