we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Dude, it's gettin so bad even my fantasies just wanna be friends.
Is it a step in the wrong direction to ask my parents for a kegerator for graduation?
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
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