Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Napping in front of family members can be embarrassing when you get a christmas boner in your sleep
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
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