Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
He's over here like "remember those pics you sent me a couple years ago? Those were hot." And I'm like "remember talking about what we were gonna name our kids a couple months ago? That was hot." Therein lies the disconnect
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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