so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I don't listen when you talk. I just try to find new creative ways to get you to send me naked pictures.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
He didn't call me beautiful but he came in less than five minutes so same thing, right?
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
You stumbled into the hotel room escorted by security and then went into the bathroom sat by the toilet, threw up for hours while slamming your head on the wall and whimpering "why" over and over.. I went to bed
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
