Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
My roommate said I banged on the wall and said, "this dude eats pussy like a champ."
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Why is there a wet sock in my garbage? Why did I chug so much red wine? Why was someone signing into my iCloud account at 4 am in China? Why do I do self-destructive reckless things? So many questions.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
Randomize
