So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
He's trying to kill me, one liver cell at a time. It's going to be a slow, but awesome death
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
I realized it was a bad idea when I broke my collar bone
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
Alright dude i'm gonna go to go sleep off this soberness. my life is a cosmic joke
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I don't remember much and some girl almost convinced me to jump off the bridge while she held my stuff...
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
im half tempted just to scoot up to him and whisper "I'm not wearing underwear" but idk if thats a heartfelt apology
Randomize
