Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
Im playing the how drunk can i get before my card declines game. being single sucks. But getting drunk after work alone in fridays on a wenesday night sucks way more.
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
the guy sitting next to me at the bar has a patrick swayze tattoo hovering over a roast beef sandwich. 'merica.
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
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