i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Oh. Im drinking alone in a banana costume. Every time youre feeling down, i want you to think of me right now and know that your life is better than mine.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Operation "Inform her family she stars in a sadistic lesbian porn film" is in full effect. She picked the wrong guy to cheat on.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
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