We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
He dodged my hug and greeted me with a fist bump. I slept with him the night before. The only thing worse would have been a greeting by chest bump.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
I should become a firefighter. Who uses his cock to fight fires. Like a Superhero.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
So, random question. How much should you tip a Lyft driver when you realized you've fucked his sister? Asking for a friend.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
