i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
I just encountered the same creepy guy I showed you, he jumped inside the dumpster screaming.
I don't care that you had sex on my bed. I care that you used my lollipop condom. I was saving that for a special occasion
It was a special occasion. Your best friend had crazy awesome sex on your bed. Thank you
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
I woke up saran wrapped to a chair....
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
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