Hey man sorry I got all grabby
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
They woke me up at 6am and made me drink a bottle pf champagne yelling "champagne breakfast!"
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Her ex wouldn't stop texting her so she started replying with various pictures of Britney spears's breakdown
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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