this other lifeguard and I are actually considering paying a kid to shit in the pool
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
UPDATE: lighting the grill with Bacardi. Haven't slept. Forgot the hamburger buns. Almost out of our eighth handle.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
my mom asked if I found my Easter basket. it's 1PM & I got home an hour ago from last night. if I'm looking for anything, it's my dignity.
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
Randomize
