I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
You played Frank Sinatra today after we had sex. You moved way up in my literal book of men. Congrats.
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
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