woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I just mixed tequila and nyquil in front of dad. hes making ambulance jokes but let me tell you its DELICIOUSSS
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
I've come to the conclusion that the dicks in Arizona just don't have enough size for me.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
There is a glee sing along. It's on random and they know them all. Like, the specific glee timings and pauses. I need to leave. I need to escape
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Don't worry, I'm taking the best gay radar in the World, my sister's boobs. All guy who is not looking at them, it's fair play for us.
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
