Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
the more i look through evidence of last night, the less i seem to remember.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
I didn't notice because vodka
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
i feel like i got punched in the face....
you did....
Randomize
