I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
5 am is for sleeping. Or getting railed on by a stranger. But never for fundraising. Get real.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
That freshman kid successfully snuck into a college party, got caught, proceeded to jump out of a second story window without getting a scratch then met up with us a block away and somehow managed to get a bottle of grey goose in the meantime. He is truly blessed by the alcohol gods
The judge mental looks i am getting while looking at porn on my phone sitting in the urgent care waiting room is gonna get way worse when they find out im here to see if im pregnant
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
I feel like I had a successful night. I flashed the guy at the liquor store last night for 2 free tshirts and a giant redbull.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
