all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
Eventually I will start sleeping with people who actually want to hangout with me the next day... But not today
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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