Whod you bang
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
Literally, and I mean LITERALLY as in "not to be confused with a casual hyperbole", LITERALLY the day we broke up she slept with 3 different guys that night.
1) It's nice to see that the whole "English Major" thing is upping the quality of your rants 2) Have you considered that your dick was the cork holding her sluttiness in?
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
Sarah just give sum homeless dude a lap dance, took like 2$ worth of change from his cup and was all like, "Biiitch, this aint free"..
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
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