In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
"Party in the USA" was played at church youth group last night. It was like everything I enjoy hating was aligning against me.
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
The light burnt out and he thinks the power is out in the whole house. He is cooking a hog dog over two candles. I'm gonna see if he'll make me one
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I just chased my birth control with Smirnoff. Shit's about to go down.
Randomize
