Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Do you realize that Last night you pissed in my closet and then walked to the bathroom to wash your hands?
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
Being single again makes you realize how guys can go from licking your asshole one night to never texting you again
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
