If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
pretty sure I offered to blow her dad. she's not speaking to me & he won't stop winking at me.
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
when the washing machine is on all the beer bottles jiggle and clink against each other... "drink us drink us drink us"
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
Can we go out and do something semi fancy soon? I feel like wearing a dress and pretending to be an adult.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
As soon as he called me 'darling' in that Scottish accent... my pants just dropped.
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
