white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
my brother wants to know why there are wet balloons in his bed and i think you forgot to throw the condoms away but im too hungover to check if thats what hes talking about
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Well at least ssomeone is or the state is tafing over ir in twligiob
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
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