I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
He gave me an orgasm with his left hand...and he's right handed. Of course he's a keeper.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
As a gentleman whose genital hole is relatively small, you could imagine my reaction
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Randomize