The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
