Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Speaking of fellatio on fictional characters, the Stay Puft Marshmallow Man would be a delicious blowjob.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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