Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
This morning I got out of bed 4 HOURS LATE, made eggs with a plastic beach shovel, and then ate them using pens like chopsticks in my bed with my turtle. Obviously, I am not in the mood to be proactive with my life today...
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
50% drunk capacity currently
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Just got a motivational speech from the tacobell drive thru guy at 2am
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Randomize
