What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
he's my edward cullen
I am pretty sure Edward Cullen never had an all-day drinking binge topped off with some blow.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
It was like little house on the drunk prairie.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Randomize
