just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
That shot tasted like Sant Claus came in my mouth. I love the holidays.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
I think you're overestimating how drunk I was
You said your pillow felt like the ocean...
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
wow wtf man i was the friend bailing you out of jail with 500 cash and you didnt have the common courtesy of waking me up for class when i passed out drunk and naked in the bath tub
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
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