So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Randomize
