Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I just came so hard I farted. Twice. Thank God I'm alone.
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
I'm classy like audry Hepburn. Chugging wine out of the bottle on the way to the club. Shed do that. I know she would.
Randomize
