She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
If I had a nickel for every time somebody called me a bad person I would have enough money to check into rehab
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
idk what id do withouhrh yoy btro
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
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