Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
I haven't gotten laid in forever. I'm obsessed. I imagine I this is how Ethopians feel about food.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I walked out of the store holding my face and a lady pulled her daughter away from me as I then threwup in the parking lot
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
Randomize