i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
yeah seriously, fuck school. I'm changing my master's thesis question from "what are the neuropsychological correlates of antisocial personality" to "will my cat drink this beer"
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I just want to eat chicken fingers and drink beer and smoke in bed with my laptop so I can watch Netflix
So your not doing THAT great with the break up then...
Yah. I'm gonna lay you down and feed you grapes, except I'm gonna replace grapes for my balls
Randomize