then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
can't come. weird drunk guy passed out on couch. long story, tell u later.
wtf. wake him up, call him a cab, get over here!
i just want to make sure he doesn't die. or rob me. plus it's facinating, he's faceplant on the arm of my sofa.
Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
I feel better now, I have multiple fuck buddies again
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
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