Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
You followed me up the stairs while i was throwing up yelling "projectile! projectile! projectile!"
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
